Uh, ok bye?


"Isn't that the mom and dad from swim class" my husband asked.

I looked, and it was. We were at the farmers market and had left swim class 20 minutes prior. We had also just (sort of) met them a week ago at the first class, and they seemed nice. Granted, we didn't exchange names (except that of our kids) and I only briefly talked to the dad, who was in the pool with their infant son. But, I figured since we were both there at the farmers market at the same time - it might be nice to test the waters on a possible friendship, seeing as how our kiddos were testing the waters together at swim class.

I also had no plans of using that horribly corny line on them.

So, we walked up and I gave a little wave and smiled and said, "swim class, right? I'm Amanda..." and the mom just nodded and said something like, "Oh...yeah."

OK. Sooo, uhhh...

Her husband silently walked away to a table and sat down while she was waiting for their ice cream. I tried to make small talk about how cute their little girl and baby boy was and "how great they are in the water!" and I even said, "this is Owen..." and she literally ignored me except for tight smiles. When her food order came up, she said, to her daughter (I think), “let's go over here" and they just walked away to the table where the husband and baby were.

"Are we...supposed to...follow her, or...?" I said to my husband, who was JUST as bewildered and he said, "...she didn't say 'bye' or anything, so...but, I don't know..."

We looked at their table, and I thought maybe I would be able to gauge what the heck we were supposed to do, and then we walked somewhat closer to their table to see if they would pick their heads up and wave us over but nope. The vibe was clear. Their heads were down and body language colder than the pool water. I realized...she meant to give me an Irish goodbye right to my face.


Here's the thing: I don't need to be friends with every mom I meet. I'm well aware that just because we are both women who have children doesn't mean we have a ton of shit in common and will be lifelong friends. I actually went home and stewed about this for way too long. I started laughing so hard at a scenario I cooked up where she goes around annoyed with every mom who tries to talk to her like she's famous or won some Best Mom Friend award and is now so overloaded with women wanting to breathe her air that she can't possibly even stand to engage with another human being lest they get the wrong idea.

Ugh. Because, you know what it all comes down to? I'm just big on manners. Like, please and thank you, chewing with your mouth closed...and simply saying 'hello' and 'goodbye' when appropriate. Basic stuff. Seems simple, right? I thought so, too.

Especially when, um...aren't children supposed to learn this stuff by example? I mean, let's be honest -- she could've even just said "bye!" to my KID and I would've been fine with that.