Can we not do this anymore?



Remark on a woman's weight gain/loss? Between the comments about Amy Schumer hosting the MTV Movie Awards and singers Pink and Kelly Clarkson having to defend themselves against comments made about their weight, I'm just over it. Not only is it mean and immature - and in most cases, very "Thanks, Captain Obvious" - but it's boring. Don't we have better things to talk about? Yes, we do. Like...

Man buns? What is it with these disasters? It reminds me of when my hair was too short to put up, but I'd try, and wind up with some little dinky knob that reminded me of Pepper from American Horror Story, which would make me grimace and have to immediately take it down. If you're a man, and you have long hair, why not just let it fly free? And, if you want it out of your face, just pull it back into a ponytail. Why spend the time putting it into a bun, and oh my God please tell me no guy is using Hot Buns. And, yes - I realize this is very hypocritical of me to talk about after my above paragraph, but I'm not perfect. And I hate man buns.

Trend dieting? I like kale, sure - and, I love soup...but I don't want to live on it. AND I DON'T WANT EVERY MEAL FROM A PRE-PACKED MASON JAR. However, I do think they look really pretty. 

Walking in to Target for just one thing, and coming out with 11 things? No, we can't stop doing that. I'm speaking for everyone. We can't. It is virtually impossible. Speaking of Target...

...can we stop freaking out over anything Lilly Pulitzer? I don't get why LP is so popular, but everything sold out in Target, like, the first 10 minutes it was released. Personally, I find the prints wildly obnoxious, and I would never feel comfortable wearing any of them, for fear of everyone staring. In fact, I think all of her prints look like they only belong on bathing suit cover-ups. Which, is also ironic, because I also think the shape of most of her dresses is exactly as shapeless as bathing suit cover-ups. I don't get it.

Recording live music on our phones? I was watching the ACM Awards last night, and saw soooo many people in the front rows recording the performances on their phones. I don't understand this, and never really have. What is the point of going to a show in-person, only to watch it via your phone screen? Answer: Zero.

And, finally...can we stop complaining about Monday on every.single.Monday? I feel bad for Monday. Monday gets so much abuse from us, that Monday has developed a complex and treats us all like crap in return. I don't blame Monday for being mad. Let's try to be nicer about Monday and compliment Monday and maybe Monday will be better to us...

On Tuesday.

Happy marvelous, magnificent, magical Monday!